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Name: Tace

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Let There Be Light...


Recipe for a refuse lamp:

  • Get you a lamp. Preferably one found sitting in the communal trash area of an apartment complex you lived at 4 years ago and you've been using as a plain jane boring lamp since then. (We lived at the apartment complex, not in the communal trash area, though from the amount of furniture discarded there every week you could make yourself right comfortable amongst the trash bins if need be. I swear that trash area had nicer furniture than most people's houses I've been in)
  • Gather your guilt and accumulated pile of stuff you can't bare to throw in the trash and decide if you're gonna have it take up space in your house it might as well be as something useful. Things like aluminum coffee pots that got funky inside and are no longer being used since you've upgraded to the stainless steel model of them, a broken coffee cup, a sweet looking steel cut oats can and some corks are all good.
  • Ask your Mother-in-law to keep her eyes peeled for a colander for a lamp shade for your kitchen-esque themed refuse lamp creation and then have her actually go one better and score a .25 cent fryer basket from a yard sale and be kind enough to give it to you.
  • Don some swank looking safety goggles and then drill holes in everything so the rod of the lamp can fit through and stack it all up on the lamp rod as you see fit. Please note you can do a nice messy job of cracking out the bottom of the coffee mug because a neat and tidy hole won't make any difference, since it's pressed down against oats can lid. Holding your breath while slamming a screw driver down through the bottom of the coffee cup may or may not have been what kept the entire thing from shattering...but don't rule it out. Never rule out the power of holding your breath.
  • Bat your eyelashes at your blue eyed husband and call upon his expert handy man skills and assistance in wiring the lamp back together, bending bits of metal and also encouraging you not to run around like a mad woman drilling holes in everything until you're sure they'll all fit on the lamp rod. Thanks to him I don't have half a dozen items with holes in them that don't need em.......
  • Get a cute little fluorescent bulb and screw in to your wicked awesome refuse lamp and turn it on with a few soft spoken words and whispered bits of flattery...or you can just hit the switch.
  • Bask in the soft light of your creation that cost...well what ever the price of the bulb and two bits of wire cost.
(Place of honor on top of the fridge for my kitchen-esque themed lamp!)

(The cat was exhausted and couldn't stay awake any longer waiting for us to finish our lamping. Either that or she was bored senseless.)

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Monday, June 30, 2008

Behooved to share my shopping feat....

Does it make sense if I say we're not impulse shoppers but we follow our impulses shopping? Our wills are made of the strongest material, a woven fabric of consciousness embedded with practicality, innate frugality and a layer of realism glued down with common sense.
Hence the reason I can stand in a backed up checkout line at the super market and not only look at the rows of candy but actually not WANT any of it. Candy bars schmandy bars, don't need em or want em. I fully realize that my confidence is shored up by the very foundation of some damn good 70% dark chocolate at home....but still. Pretty impressive huh?
We don't buy gum, we don't buy magazines and sometimes we walk down the cookie aisle and talk about checking to see if they have any good organic fruit this week....and our eyes don't even dart to the side, nor does drool drip from our lips. And I really mean it this time, not a drop of drool dampens the store floor...not a drop.
We can go to a department store and while we do enjoy browsing and meandering our way amongst the shelves and aisles, we don't randomly throw bits of "gots to haves its, really needs its or ohhhhhh mine mines!" in to the cart all willy nilly.
Because we are not impulse shoppers.
I have said it before and there's no one I like better to quote than myself so I shall say it again....(plus some things like coffee, sunset gazing and brownie baking are worth repeating) I like making purchases when I've had time to read reviews. Things are just better when 376 other people have already agreed that it is.
Also we like to comparison shop, we like to see if THOSE highball glasses are really the BEST highball glasses, if THAT book is available on Half.com or if there's a recipe for something so I can make it from scratch instead of store bought.
I know, we're crazy people huh.....neck deep in web links, tabs and bookmarks for anything that strikes our fancy. NASA probably doesn't put as much thought into their astronaut socks as we do into our grapefruit seed extract.
Like I said we're NOT impulse shoppers...........BUT......(I just love big buts)
BUT, we follow our impulses. Which is to say that should it strike our fancy to make some homemade bread we will pop out and purchase the necessary ingredients on a spur of the moment whim, we will grab the latest Wii video game that we were lusting after AND make no apologies for sampling Häagen-Dazs' newest flavour (Fleur de Sel caramel ice cream) when we see it at the store.
At times there's almost a psychic quality to our impulses, never have I had any buyer's remorse that I can recall. There are times when my sweetie and I will pause in front a box of wine glasses on a busy Target aisle and just KNOW, those are OUR wine glasses. A quick look we share, words need not be spoken and in to the cart it goes. It's not impulse shopping, it's following the psychic impulse to buy what's really already ours....just a few minor details like payment and timelines stand between us and our glasses.
We have come to rely on this sense, if we should shuffle our feet and frown and ponder a little too long over a a potential purchase often times we pass it by. Figuring if it were reallllllly meant to be ours, or we reaaaaaaaaaly wanted it than we'd have it in our cart already.
I can not count the number of times me or my sweetie has enthusiastically blurted "Do you want to just get it? Want to? We'll just get it!"
And when we do, when we follow this impulse that is vibrating in our brains tellings us we NEED this item we never regret it.
Like toe shoes.
Well they're not called toe shoes but that's what they are. Shoes that are like toe socks, only shoes. God, don't you just want to faint from the glory of that very idea? TOE-SHOES!
It's like the shoe people reached in to our brains and plucked from amongst the rabble inspiration for shoes we didn't even know we needed.
Shoes for people who like to be in their bare feet. But bare feet, while comfy and relaxing at home, gets you some majorly annoyed scowls at the grocery store.
My husband ran across these shoes in the typical way one runs across anything on the internet. He was reading up on these people who run in their bare feet, or almost bare feet and were supposedly the fastest marathon runners on earth.
A few million link clicks later and a gasp of such impending importance reverberated through the house alerted me to a life changing discovery by my husband. He forwarded me the link...I looked....I loved.....
TOE SHOES!!!!
Incredibly flexible, thin shoes that's almost like wearing nothing at all..EXCEPT, their soles protect your footsie wootsies from sharp sticks and glass and the general ick of pavement filth and citified nature trails. Oh, and of course they have the marvelous advantage of each toe having it's own little compartment.
We stared at them in combined amazement, it was another one of those "understandings". These were cool. We both knew it, we both wanted them.
I'll admit they're the priciest pair of shoes either of us has ever bought, actually they're the second priciest bit of apparel I've ever owned. (the first being my wedding dress that came in at a whopping 100 dollars!) We're frugal and proud of it BUT unlike some ordinary shoes these are shoes that really feel unique. Just like walking in your bare feet, you can feel the textures of grass, dirt, sand, pavement and twigs under your feet.
If you're asking yourself "why would any one want to feel that?" then you just don't *get it*. These shoes add a whole new level of tactile sensation to a walk, and if you have any interest at all in enjoying a bit of nature and out of doors than I can not recommend them enough!
They also encourage you to get out and walk more, just to feel new things under your feet. Have no fear that my shoes are actually talking to me, whispering sweet nothings in my ears, telling me I should walk up the side of the cement steps, take a stroll through the bushes, wander over the yellow bumpy things on the ground in front of the grocery store, climb a tree or start researching parks like mad so we can find more places to go walk around in our toe shoes. I thought of all those things on my own, inspired like heck by my new footware.
The FiveFingers add to the *barefoot feel* by fitting your feet like a glove, the material hugs your foot like a second skin. Snug but not too tight, it seems unlikely you'd suffer from blisters in shoes like these. They're machine washable too so I can't wait to find some mud to tromp through. I suppose I could make some mud....
The Vibram FiveFingers KSO shoes are a welcome addition to our family. It's amazing how a little thing like a bit of molded rubber for your feet can be so inspiring but it's true. We have already visted two different local parks and walked further than we ever have before down our little road here, just during this past week alone.
Supposedly the Vibram FiveFinger shoes can strengthen your feet muscles and that you will have greater foot flexibility since your toes are separated and you use them more for walking. Also that your posture is improved and leg muscles can be strengthened as well. That's a lot for a pair of shoes to accomplish but when you wear them for an extended period of time walking it doesn't sound so crazy. Just by virtue of the fact we've been inspired to go for longer walks over rougher terrain than pavement is going to bring us some added health benefits.
And ya know what? We looked dang cool doing it too. I am so glad we follow our impulses.

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Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Rooting for it!

How you know when you're waaayyyy too happy about a recent trip to the Endodontist? First you write a poem about your root canal, then you sing it so much it gets stuck in your head AND your husband's, then you make your computer's speak program sing it to you when you tire of your own voice, then you record the computer and put it on your blog. That's how you know.
Listen to my root canal poem/song: ("Alex" the computer voice doesn't know how to say the word "Nasties". Silly computer.) The Lyrics are below, sing along...you know you want to....




No one's ever loved a root canal
Like I loved getting a root canal.
A root canal can be a gal's best friend.
When your head is throbbing
and you're sick of sobbing,
A root canal can make the nasties end.

A root canal's a lovely thing
if all you want to do is sing
instead of moaning curled up on the kitchen floor.
Drilling teeth's not usually so fun
But you'll be glad when it is done
and wish that you could go for 7 more.

Cause a root canal is over looked,
other vacations all are booked,
But the dentist's chair's relaxing in the end.
If your teeth are screaming mad,
your cavities are awful bad,
A root canal can be a gal's best friend.

Oh drill me
Then fill me
Poke holes in my back tooth.
Then crown me
Don't frown see
I'm better off it's truth!

No one's ever loved a root canal
Like I loved getting a root canal.
A root canal can be a gal's best friend.
When your jaw is killing you,
and another day you can't get through,
A root canal can make the nasties end!

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